10 Things I Learned From Teaching in Haiti

1. If it looks like rain (and the only rain here is of the torrential downpour variety), expect most of your students not to show up. In fact, you probably shouldn't show up either to avoid potential rain-induced injuries. (I wish I wasn't speaking from experience.)
2. If you plan on doing a lesson on health and body parts, you sure as hell better be ready to translate "vaginal infection" and repeat it as many times as it takes to get the pronunciation correct. 
3. Urbandictionary.com is the most useful resource for finding the definitions of words your students hear in Lil' Wayne songs and want to have translated. As a result, I now know what "cho-cha" means, and it isn't even English.
4. It's okay to say "No." For example, "No, you don't need my phone number." Or, "No thanks, (for the 15th time) God and I will be just fine if I don't go to the three hour Baptist service." Also, "No, I can't buy you a laptop today." And finally, "No, I'm not engaged or married, and there's nothing wrong with it at 23!"
5. Always stick up for my fellow women.
   Student - "Maria, how many sons do you want?"
   Me (Mainly for the shock) - "None."
6. Some days 50 students will show up for class, other days just two. (I prefer just two, those are always the best days!)
7. Every student will ask for your phone number, and if they can be your best friend.
8. Again, referencing #2, if you're opening yourself up to a game where they need to share as many words as they know in English that begin with the letter "B", you better be willing to accept "boobies".
9. Have patience. Saying class will start at 10am means you'll actually start at 10:20, and still have people trickling in until about 11:00, but still be expected to finish promptly at 11:30, and I've been happy to oblige because teaching in three languages is exhausting! 
10. On a sincere note, I've found even more evidence for the universality of students in a classroom. If you are dynamic and exciting, your students will be into whatever you're teaching. If you aren't prepared, you can't expect students to take your class seriously. This is true whether I'm in rural Borgne, Haiti, urban Toulouse, France, inner-city Washington, D.C., or suburban Frederick, Maryland. It was easy for me to forget the ceilings that were cracked and leaking and the floor covered with animal feces when there were perfect moments of laughter over botched pronunciation (by both teacher and student) and excitement over correct answers.